A Journey To Remember
by E Lufting
Summary: Just updated my story. Thanks for all the reviews. Will update chp 16. When I read it again I did not like the way it ended. As always your reviews are welcome
1. Default Chapter

  
Prologue   
  
  
Its been 15 years since the events of A Walk To Remember.Landon graduated from college and went on to medical school. Then having completed his internship and residency he choose his specialty in the area of the treatment of leukemia.  
With the help of his father he created a medical practice called The Jamie Sullivan center for the treatment of leukemia. Also working With Landon are two of his closest friends Eric Hunter and Belinda Reynolds.Both are respected doctors as well thanks thanks to Landons influence and guidance.  
Jamie is still an influence on Landons life as he helps people in their struggle and saving lives. Landon still wears his wedding ring, and only Belinda,Eric and his dad know the reason he says he is still married and the staff are unaware that Jamie sullivan was the wife of Dr Landon Carter.  
But one day a new patient will come into their lives that will change all of them especially Landon and send them on A Journey To Remember. 


	2. Chapter one: The Journey Begins

Chapter One: The Journey Begins   
Please Read and review and let me know what you think.   
  
Belinda waited nervousley wondering what she should do.She was the opening doctor on call this morning, Eric and Landon would be coming in soon.  
She was hoping Eric would arrive first before Landon she thought as she waited for Eric to show up.  
She paced in front of the door waiting when she saw Eric walk in through the door.  
"Hello Belinda How Are things going" ? "Just fine Eric we have five patients waiting and one new referral". "Thats great Belinda".  
" Maybe not so great" replied Belinda "The new referral was sent by Doctor Anderson But I think we should refer her to someone else." Why " asked Eric We never   
passed on anyone before even on people who cound not pay. Landon has never turned anyone away why would he start now."  
  
  
Belinda took Eric aside, " I think we should refer her to someone else because.....because". Eric saw the hesitation in her eyes, What is it Belinda whats wrong ?  
Belinda took a deep breathe, "Its because she looks exactly like Jamie Sullivan not just a little, not just a lot, but exactly like her maybe an older version but Im telling you  
you she looks exactly like Jamie". " Your kidding right" as Eric tried to laugh it off but the seriousness on her face told him she was not kidding.  
  
What her name ? asked Eric. Her name is Amy Johnson replied Belinda, She has had leukemia for about a year now but its reached stage two and conventional treatment   
is no longer effective or or at least marginally effective. Life expectancy is at two years unless were suceesful in helping her.  
  
  
" Where is she now " ? asked Eric. "In exam room five " Belinda said. Eric seemed deep in thought as if deciding what to do. Finally he replied " Even though you,me and Landon  
are equal partners and while we do have the authority to refer her to another doctor Landon will want to know why ".  
  
Suddenly Landon walked in " Hello Belinda, Eric things running smoothly". Both Belinda and Eric remained silent both unsure of what to say. " Guys what going on, Is something wrong" ?   
Belinda was the first to speak, " Hello Landon " she said as she gave him a hug." Hey man " said Eric "Landon we have new referral and I was thinking we should refer her to someone else".  
"Why" asked Landon ? Eric hesitated and said " on second thought I would like to take care of this one myself. Landon looked at him an amused look on his face. " Eric you always seem to get  
the prettiest patients but not this time buddy. I think I will be taking this one. What room is she in" ?  
" Exam room five " said Belinda as he walked passed both of them. " Landon wait" called Belinda ' She wanted to tell him but could not find the words." It can wait " She replied.  
Landon walked into his office changing from his suit to a white doctors coat then from his office to the nurses station picking up the chart for the patient in room five glancing through it  
as he walked to just outside the door to exam room number five. 


	3. Chapter Two:First Meeting

Chapter Two: First Meeting  
  
Landon stood in front of the door , reviewing the notes on her medical file. He opened the door and walked in. " Hello Ms Johnson Im Doctor Landon Carter. " " Hello Doctor Carter " Landon looked up and froze. He could move,couldint say anything he just stared at her. " Doctor Carter , are you all right "  
  
Landon felt his heart skip a beat . He closed his eyes and took a deep breathe and opened his eyes, she was still, there he wasn't dreaming. She was looking at him, a confused look on her face but also one of concern. " I just remembered something " He replied shakily and quickly left without saying another word. and went straight to his office and closed the door.  
  
He tried to compose himself , he went back behind his desk and sat down. On his desk sat three pictures of Jamie one was of her from the school play, the other was from their wedding and the last was of her blowing a kiss toward the camera. He just aat there staring at them when he heard a quiet knock at the door.  
  
" Landon its me Belinda , Landon " she called as she quietly opened the door peeked in at first closing the door behind her then turned to face him. " Landon are you okay " ? " Why did you not say something " asked Landon." I dont know, I wanted to but I just didnt know what to say. " You dont have to see her Landon after you left I sent in Eric too see her. We can still refer her to someone else if its to difficult for you.  
  
" No its allright " Landon said as he stood from behind his desk. " All I have to do is remember that she is not Jamie, How hard can that be " as he smiled. Belinda could tell that he wasnt being honest with her but they would have more time to talk later  
  
" Thanks for being such a good friend " said Landon as he hugged her. " Are you sure you are all right with this ? " asked Belinda. " Ill be fine dont worry. as he opened the door for her. " Okay I will see you later said Belinda. 


	4. Chapter Three: A Friend Remembered

Chapter Three: A Friend Remembered  
  
  
  
As Belinda walked down the hall, toward her office, she was worried, not just for Landon but for herself and for Eric as well. She thought they all had pretty much moved on but now........  
  
Belinda opened the door to her office and walked in. On one side of the office, on the wall was the pictures of the hundreds of children she had treated over the years some of them made it but others did not. Above their pictures on a wooden plaque was the words " Jamie's Legacy.  
  
When she choose Pediatric Leukemia as her specialty it was were she wanted to be, were she thought she could do the most good.Though both Landon And Eric warned her that while she would recieve great satisfaction it also had the most heartbreak.  
  
Belinda sat down at her desk deep in thought as she turned to face the wall. On the wall was a picture of her and Jamie hugging. Looking at the picture Belinda still found it hard to believe that she and Jamie became the best of friends, no she thought she became her best friend.  
  
She closed her eyes and remembered when that picture was taken. It was taken the day when Jamie started her journey toward faith and God.  
  
It was two weeks after Landon and Jamies wedding. Though she had been at the wedding and reception and see saw Landon occasionally she avoided seeing Jamie. She had never known anyone before who was dying and it being Jamie made it seem worse Maybe it was because of the way she treated her over the years and while she had apologized to Landon she had never apologized to Jamie. Maybe she was afraid, she remebered crying when she found out about jamie and when she was giving Landon the pictures from the spring play.  
  
One day she had run into Landon while shopping." Hello Belinda, How is it going"? " Just fine Landon, How are you two holding up " ? " Some days are better then others but shes doing great, in fact next week this saturday were having a picnic at a park you know friends,family." Thats great Landon Im glad you two are happy."  
  
" One thing though Belinda before you go Jamie wanted to ask you if you come to the picnic also." " Why " asked Belinda." She said she wanted to talk to you about something important What is it Jamie would not say." Belinda let out a deep sigh wondering what she shouild do." Okay Landon Ill be there." " Thanks Belinda I thank you and Jamie thanks you."  
  
On saturday Belinda stepped out of her car, it was a beautiful spring day. She walked down the pathway She saw jamie sitting on a blanket by herself underneath a tree, Landon was talking to his mother and father while barbecuing.  
  
  
  
As she walked up to her she could see Lamdon looking at her out of the corner of his eye, just by the look on his face she could tell that Jamie still had not told him what it was she wanted to say to Belinda and if the truth be told she was kind of wondering herself.  
  
  
  
Jamie smiled at the sight Of Belinda. ": Hello Belinda Im just so happy that you decided to join us " " No problem Jamie " she replied not really looking at her, but at the green bottle of oxygen next to her on a wheeled carrier, she still was not was not ready for this." I like to thank you for coming to the wedding and reception it meant a lot to Landon and me. " You welcome " she replied and then before Jamie could said anything else " I really do have to be going. "  
  
" Please wait I really need to talk to you about something , Walk with me " as she extended her hand upward to Belinda.  
  
" Are you sure your up to this " she asked a concerned look on her face.  
  
" Ill be fine but well take the oxygen with us just in case " as Belinda helped her up.  
  
They were walking on a dirt trail Belinda helped support Jamie as they walked as she pulled the bottle behind them. Jamie was quiet as if she thinking about what she wanted to say.  
  
" Listen Jamie I just wanted to say I was sorry for everything I ever did to you. " Jamie looked at her " its okay Belinda Landon told me about everthing you did for him apologizing to him giving him the pictures from the spring play and being their for him just to talk to. " Im just glad your here, I just wanted to thank you "  
  
" Thank me for what "  
  
" For being such a good friend to Landon , And to me also. Landon needs a good friend now The next few months will be hard on him especially the last month before I.....I.......  
  
Jamie looked away " I need to sit down " a few minutes as they approched a bench the both sat down..  
  
" Are you okay should I get Landon "  
  
" No Ill be fine dont worry. Anyways Belinda Landon will need your help, your strength, your faith to help him through this.  
  
She could fell the tears begin to flow as Jamie said those words to her help, strength,faith those words had never applied to her.  
  
She closed her eyes then opened them looking straight st Jamie " Please Jamie dont ask me too, I can't help Landon I can't even help myself. I just dont have your strength, your faith, your belief in God.  
  
Jamie hugged Belinda " It will be allright your stronger than you think. Would you say a prayer with me ? Belinda nodded yes  
  
" Dear God " " Grant me your strength, your wisdom, your perseverance. Be my guiding light in the difficult times ahead. Let me put my faith and trust in that things will be allright in the end. Show me your blessings in everything today. Make your presence known to me in the small miracles of everyday life and in the goodness of ordinary people  
  
Amen  
  
Since that day she and Jamie became even closer. She had dinner at their house frequently, Went to church with them on sundays. Even met just with Jamie to read and discuss the bible.She also helped both Jamie and Landon when they needed help.During her last month She even moved into their house to help take care of Jamie., and she was at her bedside when Jamie went and even spoke at her memorial service.  
  
Belinda opened her eyes. She had not thought about that day in years. She missed her terribly as she wiped the tears from her eyes. She still had children and their parents who needed her as she stood up from her desk and walked towards the door opening it than turned around pausing to look at the picture of her and Jamie.  
  
" Thank you Jamie, Thanks for everything. I miss you and you will always be my best friend and for giving me the strength and faith to go on " as she stepped quietly out of her office closing the door behind her.  
  
  
  
Thanks for all the nice reviews. Please keep the reviews coming. Originally I had planned on this being a romantic story. but also focus on the friendship of Eric ,Belinda and Landon. and Jamies friendship with Eric and Belinda through flashbacks I might focus on the friendship theme and not do the romantic part. The charecter of Amy will still be included in the story but just as a friend It just depends on if and when I write the next few chapters 


	5. Chapter Four: The Exam

Chapter Four : The Exam  
  
Eric was quickly going through Amy Johnsons medical history to at least get a general overview of her conditon. Belinda had went to see if Landon was okay so it was up to him to see her. Although he and Jamie became friends he was not as close to her as Belinda had become, and while he was saddened by her passing he was at the time more concerned about how her death affected both Landon and Belinda. Even though Jamie did have some influence in his choice to become a doctor he was not a particularly religious person. Landon had influenced him more in the path his life had taken. Eric opened the door to room five and walked in.  
  
" Hello Ms Johnson Im Doctor Eric Hunter but you can call me Eric were pretty informal around here "  
  
"Hello Eric you can call me Amy " For some reason Eric avoided looking at her directly as he thought to himself , " Cmon Eric look at her you can do it you were not that close to Jamie as he wondered why he was reacting this way. " Finally he looked up to get his first good look at her. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail. Her eyes were the same color, and her smile was.............  
  
" Eric are you okay ? you haven' t said anything in five minutes "  
  
" Everythings fine, sorry I was just thinking "  
  
" Not about me I hope. " she said laughing as she smiled.  
  
" Its nothing important " as he felt more at ease in her presence Eric could not help but notice her friendly positive attitude despite the seriousness of her condition.  
  
" Thats good by the way what happened to Doctor Carter ? "  
  
" He had some urgent business, personal reasons. Ill be taking care of you now "  
  
" Too bad I thought he was kind of cute though maybe a little uptight "  
  
" Can I ask you something else ? "  
  
" Sure what is it . "  
  
" Well Doctor Carter seemed to be kind of flustered when I first met him, A bit out of sorts. But its not just him when I first walked in Doctor Reynolds seemed a bit unnerved also. Even you at first seemed to avoid looking directly at me. Its almost like your afraid of me. " I mean I know I have leukemia and my odds of beating it are not exactly great but your doctors and it cant be that so it must be something else.  
  
Eric finally looked at her wondering what to say. ": It is something personal between me and Doctors Carter and Reynolds, but it has nothing to do with you, You just kind of remind us of a very close friend we all had."  
  
" Had " Amy thought to herself. " Had a close friend like shes no longer alive. " " Could she have been a close friend who also had leukemia but died from it " She had more questions but did not want to pry. So she just said " I understand. "  
  
" Thanks for so much for understanding. "  
  
" No problem. So Eric What are my chances ?  
  
" I agree with your doctors original assesment of at least two years but we kind of need a new work up on you. Are you still taking your medications ?  
  
" Everyday "  
  
" Good continue with your meds When can you come in for a complete workup ?  
  
" How about Friday Morning "  
  
" Perfect It might take a better part of the day "  
  
" Friday it is then "  
  
" So go ahead and get dressed and stop by the nurses desk to make an appointment And Ill see you then "  
  
As she got dressed she couldin't help but think about what Eric had said about her. Later at the nurses station as she was making her appointment she saw Doctor Reynolds there. She was looking at her again when she thought she wasn't watching, Glancing at her but turning her head quickly when she looked at her. Finally she turned quickly catching Belinda by suprise smiling at her. Suddenly she saw her eyes go wide it looked like....like she was going to cry, she saw Belinda turn and quickly leave. Amy just stood there confused, she could tell she was visibly upset and it made her realize there was more to it then what Eric had told her.  
  
" Excuse me Ms Johnson " one of the nurses called to her " Here is your appointment card." Thanks replied Amy glancing at the card read The Jamie Sulilivan Center for the treatment of Leukemia." Jamie Sullivan , Jamie Sullivan " Amy thought to herself." Of course now it made sense." She now knew who the close friend was that Eric was talking about. It made sense that Landon Belinda and Eric would honor their friendship and memory by naming it after her. Still she wondered what kind of person Jamie Sullivan was and why she still influenced their lives. 


	6. Chapter Five: The Day Before

Chapter Five: The Day Before  
  
Its been a quiet two days since the Monday that Amy first came in. Well here it is Thursday afternoon thought Belinda. So far Landon had not talked about her much since that day. They talked about everything but her, Part of it was her fault because she still felt uncomfortable with it.  
  
One thing that really bothered her was the fact that even after Landon had found about Amy he still insisted that he wanted her here. She thought that Landon would change his mind about having her here but he didnt and she began to think of the reasons why, none of which were very pleasant to her.  
  
What was he thinking thought Belinda, I mean I've been pretty much out of it since that day I saw her but Landon acts as if its nothing to him. Could it be that hes attracted to her. She thought it could be a possibility but it would be for all the wrong reasons.  
  
Well enough about Landon and Amy thought Belinda she had other things to think about, her patients for example and she had a very important appointment to keep. Ever since her early days at medical school she made it a practice of spending one day a week for at least an hour doing something very important.  
  
She stood outside a door and braced herself for what was about to happen. She took a deep breathe and opened the door to a childrens playroom. Inside were seven children playing. When she went to the childrens playroom she was there not as a doctor but as a friend and just played with them, it helped form a trusting bond with the children she treated. It reminded her that the patients she was treating were still children.  
  
As soon as the children saw her they all walked up to her as she hugged each and everyone of them. The last one she hugged was a little girl about seven years old.named Melanie. She had the disease longer than the others and her prognosis was not good. In fact she was to meet with her parents later on friday when she got the final test results from the lab back but She already knew, knew what the test results would show. As she hugged her Belinda held her tightly her eyes closed feeling a immense sadness engulfing her as she knew she could not save her.  
  
As they stopped hugging each other Belinda asked " So how it going Melanie, Are you doing allright? " Im doing fine" she said " Come look what I drew for you " she said half pulling her to the art table. On the table sat a drawing of a little girl holding the hand of a woman with a doctors stethoscope encircled by a heart. " Do you like it " asked Melanie. " I Love it, Thank you so much I will aways cherish it " she said.  
  
Turning her attention to the other children she said " How would you like me to read you all a story? " " Yes " they all said in unison. "Okay then" As she went to a chair and sat down as the children gathered around her.  
  
As she sat there reading to them she saw Landon watching her from the window, something he had never done before She purposely avoided looking directly at him as she wondered what was he doing here. As she glanced sideways at him he had an amused look on his face and he was actually smiling at her as he watched.  
  
For some reason the sight of Landon smiling at here made her feel kind of flustered and she felt like she was blushing. Knock it off Belinda she thought to herself your not in high school anymore hoping Landon didn't notice.  
  
Still the sight of Landon smiling at her made her feel special, almost like he was proud of her in all that she accomplished and Belinda was proud of Landon too. For some reason she thought back to when she first noticed Landon Carter and realized she wanted him. Of course that was all in the past she thought.  
  
Things were different between them, they were the best of friends. They had been through college together, medical school, internship and residency, then setting up this medical practice. They went through god times, bad times but she, Landon and Eric had always been there for each other.  
  
She wondered what her life would have been like if she had not known Landon and through him getting to know Jamie better. 


	7. Chapter Six: Missing You

Chapter Six : Missing You  
  
It was early Friday morning. Sometimes Eric arrived early before anyone was scheduled just to have a little quiet time,to relax and to think. She would be here today ,not just for an hour but for almost three to four hours. He found comfort in the details of making sure everthing was ready Though Eric admitted to himself the only time he did this was when something was troubling him.  
  
For the past week he could not stop thinking about about Jamie. I guess I really do miss her more than I was willing to admit to myself.As he walked through the building he remembered the very last time he had talked to Jamie alone. It was about two weeks before she died. She was now completely bedridden, she was very weak and slept most of the time. She could barely eat solid foods and she had to be feed mostly through a tube.What Eric remembered most though was that despite the pain during the last two weeks she was still the same always caring , always compassionate.  
  
Eric had stopped by too see how Landon and Belinda were holding up. He had heard from Reverend Sullivan that they all three had a pretty rough night and it would only get rougher. Reverend Sullivan thought she had only maybe two weeks left through his tears as he talked to Eric.  
  
As he stood in front of the door to Landons and Jamie house he hesitated. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea. Landon and Belinda both most be exhausted but then Eric thought to himself Jamies dying when will it ever be a good time. As Eric quietly knocked on the door. When Landon opened the door he was suprised at the way he looked. He looked like he had not slept for twenty fours. Landon didn't even seem to have enough energy to give their usual greeting to each other.  
  
" Hey Landon, Hows it going ?"  
  
" Im doing okay."  
  
" How are you holding up? I heard you had a rough night.  
  
" It was a pretty rough night but Jamies resting comfortably now."  
  
" Thats nice to hear, Wheres Belinda at ?"  
  
" She out doing some shopping for us."  
  
" You look exhausted Landon, Why don't you get some sleep Ill stay with Jamie."  
  
" I can't "  
  
" Look Landon your not going to do yourself or Jamie for that matter if you collapse from exhaustion." Landon looked away, " I can't after last night I realized how close I came to losing her. She so weak Eric and Im afraid , so afraid of not being here when she when she........." Landon could not bring himself to say the words when she dies.Tears begin to fill Landons eyes unable to hold back any longer.  
  
" I love her so much Eric and the thought of me not being here in case she leaves us is just unbearable" " Look Landon your tired, exhausted, your emotionally spent after last night, you need to get some sleep. Ill stay with her and if anything happens Ill get you right away. She needs you Landon but you won't do her any good if you break down in front of her."  
  
Landon took a deep breathe then let out a deep sigh. " Your right Eric I guess I wont be doing the both of us any good if I don't get some sleep. Ill be right across the hall if you need anything or anything changes. Thanks man. " As he opened the door to the other room and stepped in.closing the door behind him.  
  
As he quietly opened the door to Landon and Jamies bedroom he heard the soft sound of oyxgen being pumped. He had not seen Jamie not that long ago but he was kind of taken aback by what he saw. She looked looked pale so very pale and he could tell she lost a lot of weight. He pulled up a chair closer to the bed and took her hand gently in his as he watched her breathe. Her eyes were closed and her hands were warm to the touch. As he looked at her he felt a quiet sadness overcome him. Why her Lord and why Landon. He had no answers and to this day he was still looking. Maybe thats why he never quite found his faith as Jamie, Landon and Belinda had done.  
  
She stirred slightly then her eyes opened " :Landon.......Landon " she called out weakly. " Hey Sunshine Its me Eric nice to see you up I was wondering if you were planning on spending the whole day in bed " he said trying to sound cheerful.as he leaned in closer." Would you like me to get him hes sleeping but if you need him."  
  
" No thats okay" Jamie replied " What time is it "  
  
" ten o clock in the morning "  
  
": ten o clock and Landons sleeping " Jamie closed her eyes and started to cry.  
  
" What is it Jamie, whats wrong Are you okay?"  
  
" Oh Eric I feel feel so helpless. Sometimes I wish it was just over with. That that Im such a burden but then I see Landons face, his smile when he sees me I see the love in his eyes and I just love him so much. Im so happy just to have one more day with him but then I realize I wont have that many days with him and I feel so sad " Jamie started to cry again.  
  
At first Eric did not know what to say, Finally he took Jamie in his arms as he felt her body rack with uncontrollable sobs. Its okay Jamie just let it out Im here for you I will always be here for you for Landon. Eric felt himself tearing up as he tried to hold back. All that matters to Landon.to everyone is that you are still here.  
  
As he sat there holding Jamie time itself seemed to be slowing down. Nothing else seemed to matter but Jamie. Eventually she stopped crying and Eric looked at her she was smiling as he brushed the tears away from her eyes." Feeling Better " asked Eric.  
  
" Thank you Eric......I dont know what to say, Im just glad your here.He felt his own tears begin to form as he quickly hugged her to hide his own tears from her wishing he could do something for her." No problem Jamie " as he layed her back down again. Eric still had her hand " Jamie I have to tell you something...........Jamie " . Eric looked at her she had fallen asleep again.  
  
He whispered softly " Im sorry Jamie so sorry for everything Im sorry for the way I treated you all these years. Im sorry that your sick you deserve better. I wish, I wish I had a chance to know you better. I'm happy that you Landon found each other. Erics thought were interupted by the soft tapping at the door as some of the staff arrived, well its time to get to work as Eric went to the front door to unlock it. 


	8. Chapter Seven:Friday

Chapter Seven :  
  
Amy just stood outside the building , in front of the doors glancing anxiously at her watch. Well it's almost time she thought. She still felt uneasy about going in. Even though Eric had been wonderful to her , but the sight of Belinda being upset almost crying when she left that Monday made her feel uncomfortable Well heres goes nothing as she pulled open the door and walked in and went straight to the front desk. " Hi I'm Amy Johnson , I have a 9:00 appointment with Doctor Hunter."  
  
" Hi Just have seat it will be just a few minutes."  
  
" Okay Oh by the way have either Doctor Carter or Doctor Reynolds come in yet."  
  
" Not till later " said the admitting nurse.  
  
" Thanks again "  
  
As she sat down she glanced around the waiting room , and noticed something a bit odd. Usually when a building or place is named after someone there is always a plaque or picture dedicated to the person but here there was nothing except for her name on the center itself. Unless of course she was the type of person who did things for the common good without thought to awards or public acclaim. Maybe it was the type of person she was thought Amy But I will probaly never know and just to have them honor her and make a big deal so it would be would be out of charecter for her so it would be appropriate if they kept it low key. Just then she heard a nurse open the door to the waiting room and call out her name  
  
" Amy Johnson " As she stood up and walked up to her  
  
. " Hello Amy Im Sarah "  
  
" Hi Sarah, How are you?"  
  
" Fine Cmon in "  
  
" So how are you feeling today, any problems?"  
  
" No I'm doing fine "  
  
" Thats great to hear " said Sarah as she opened the door to the exam room and let her in." Have a seat I'm just going to take your blood pressure , your temperture and your pulse first before we start.  
  
" Okay, Im just wondering Sarah How long have you worked here?"  
  
" I've been here since they opened about four years ago."  
  
" Only four years, I thought they all had been doctors a lot longer then that?"  
  
" Oh they all have been doctors for some time but it takes time to become a specialist in treating leukemia I guess you never stop learning. In fact Im starting medical school myself next year. I mean nursing has its rewards but Belinda, I mean Doctor Reynolds has been an inspiration to me." " It sounds like you two are very close.  
  
" We are, I first met her during my freshman year at college when she was a senior and she was in a mentor program for first year students. She really helped me my first year and I think I would not be here today doing what I'm doing?" " Thats really a great story, kind of inspiring."  
  
" Well Doctor Reynolds herself is kind of inspiring as is her faith, her trust in God. Her story is intresting also but kind of sad."  
  
" Really does it have anything to do with Jamie Sullivan? I'm just curious about her, her story. I mean people must ask you about her all the time since the center is named after her."  
  
" I really don't much about her. I know that they grew up together in Beaufort, North Carolina. I think they were friends all through high school. That she had leukemia during the last two years and she made it to graduation and through the summer but she finally died sometime in the Fall. Of course she knew more but it was of a more personel nature. When she started working here she noticed that Doctor Carter wore a wedding ring but as time passed she noticed that he never talked about his wife, had never recieved any phone calls or messages from her and she never showed up for any of the employee parties.  
  
Finally she just figured it out on her own. That Landon and Jamie knew each other all their lives , had grown up together, Probaly fell in love and were high school sweethearts and were planning to get married.But then they found out aboiut her leukemia, that she was dying but decided to get married anyway for the time that they had left together. Whenever she thought about it she felt sad and happy at the same time. Sad that she was dying but happy that they had found each other. That to this day she still inspired them and through them inspired other people including herself and also with every life they saved they formed a chain and Jamie was the first link in a unbreakable chain, a chain that would go on forever.  
  
" Well I'm finished here, another nurse will be in to take some blood sample and some other tests and lab work. Then Doctor Hunter will be in to see you later.  
  
" Thank you Sarah, I'll see you later."  
  
" Take care of yourself. "  
  
She thought about What Sarah had said and what she had learned about Jamie so far.  
  
Thanks for all the positive input. Please continue to read and review. This is actually my first attempt at writing so as long as I keep getting hits and that someone is actually reading it I will contnue this story. 


	9. Chapter Eight: In The Garden

Chapter Eight: In The Garden  
  
Amy sat outside in a garden in the center with a iv running into her arm. Erics exam and the following lab work showed her to be slightly anemic. The pills she had been taking were not as effective as they once were so know she was taking a new medication by iv . Of course this mean't she would probaly have to come in at least once a week for treatment and follow up to see how she was doing.  
  
It never ends she thought and her situation would only continue to worsen. She stopped reading and closed her eyes She almost felt like crying. She took in a slow deep breathe, in and out. Relax she told herself it will be okay. When she opened her eyes she looked around the garden it was a really beautiful colorful place. It had a nice little waterfalll she especially liked the purple lilacs surrounding it.  
  
Ever since she found out she was sick she just loved being outside, feeling the warmth of the sun on her face, looking at trees, flowers, even just seeing people, mothers and fathers being with there children. It made her feel connected to nature, to God. She was all alone Her father had died ten years ago and her mother not that long ago but before she found out her illlness and she was a only child.  
  
As she turned her attention back to her book she spotted Dr Carter out of the corner of her eye walking by.He was looking at her but not really looking at her, then he opened the door and went inside. She didn't think much about it till she saw him come out again walking on the same path he was just on. Seeing him again put a smile on her face. She was wondering why if he wanted to talk to her why he just didn't do it.He must be kind of shy which kind of made him cuter, more adorable. He must be a really nice guy. She could use a nice sweet guy in her life, especially now  
  
Normally if Amy was her old self she would just go up to the guy and say hello but she wasn't one hundred percent and moving a wheelchair by herself might not be such a good idea. So she just waved at him smiling trying to get his attention.He just kind of looked away so she started beckoning to him to come on over. Finally he walked up to her.  
  
" Hi ! Hows it going , Anything I can do for you? "  
  
" Nothing not a thing , I'd just thought I'd say Hi, so Hi. " she said laughing. She noticed that Landon was avoiding looking at her, at her eyes like he was afraid.  
  
" So How are you feeling? "  
  
" Could be better you know too few red cells, too many white cells but I will be okay "  
  
There was an awkward silence between them " Well " said Amy  
  
" Well " said Landon  
  
" Its such a beautiful day and you have such a lovely garden here. I especially love the purple lilacs someone here must of loved them."  
  
" Someone did love them , It was her favorite flower."  
  
" Was it Jamie Sullivan? " As soon as she said the name she saw the look on Landons face. It was a deep haunting look. " Landon......Landon......You okay? "  
  
" Im fine I have to to be going " And left without saying another word.  
  
As he left she noticed Dr Reynolds watching them. She looked angry and upset also before she went inside Whats going on she thought Why was everyone treating her so strangely.  
  
As Belinda walked inside the building from the garden she could not believe her eyes.Why was Landon talking to Amy. It did not make any sense to her. Why are you doing this to me Landon she thought as she went up to the front desk.  
  
" Hi Belinda your 1:00 o clock appointment is here. Its Melanie and her parents, there waiting for her test results."  
  
" Thanks Sarah Do you have her test results ready? "  
  
" Here you go " she said as she handed her the folder  
  
" Okay " as Belinda took a deep breathe as she prepared herself for what she had do to next.. It was never easy for her to tell someone that their child was dying and the day it did become easy for her was the day that she would stop practicing medicine.  
  
She went over the test results as she walked to her office and opened the door to her office. " Hello Melanie Hello Jim...Carol.  
  
" Belinda " Melanie said as she ran up to hug her.  
  
" So hows my favorite patient doing? "  
  
" Fine I missed you "  
  
" Thats always nice to hear. Tell you what Melanie Sarahs waiting for you just outside to take you to the playroom or the garden if you like I need to talk to your parents."  
  
" Okay " as she went to her mom and dad and hugged then both" I love you mom...dad "  
  
" We love you too honey " they both said  
  
Belinda closed the door behind her " Maybe you both would be more comfortable sitting on the couch while I talk to you." They both got up silently and sat down on the couch as Belinda sat down to join them.Both of them holding hands.  
  
" Jim....Carol I have her test results but you both already knew that.  
  
" What.......what does it show? " asked Jim.  
  
" It shows that her condition is getting worse not better. All forms of treatment has so far proven ineffective."  
  
" How long "  
  
" Maybe a year but with continued treatment it could be longer but you have a difficult decision to make. "  
  
" What is it? "  
  
" She could live longer but she would be in some pain.... a lot of pain and you have to choose between quality of life or quantity of life.  
  
" We need time.......time to think, but cant we make that decision when the time comes  
  
" You can but I just trying to prepare for whats next "  
  
" Thank you thank you for everything you have done for us For Melinda "  
  
" No thanks are necessary I just wish I could do more for her "  
  
" Here let me get the door for you " as she let them out.  
  
When she was alone she sat down behind her desk thinking to herself. Could this day get any worse. First Landon and Amy, then Melanie What else could go wrong . 


	10. Chapter Nine: The Argument

Chapter Nine: The Argument  
  
It was the end of a long busy day. For the first time Landon was glad it was over.Meeting Amy again had unsettled him but he made it through the day okay. All of the patients had left as had most of the staff. Leaving only him , Eric and Belinda behind. As he left his office he walked by Belinda office and noticed her door was open.Looking in he saw her reading something.  
  
" Knock Knock " He said as he walked in.Belinda didn't Look up at Landon instead she stared intently at a medical file.  
  
" I saw you talking to Amy, You two looked pretty friendly "  
  
" Whats that supposed to mean "  
  
" Nothing "  
  
" So how are things going? "  
  
" Not well "  
  
" Why "  
  
Belinda finally looked up at Landon and said two words. " Amy Johnson "  
  
" What do you mean?"  
  
That did it for Belinda, she been feeling tense and sad and upset the whole day. " If you have to ask Landon your not the person I thought you were, the person I knew all these years! " she replied angrily. She was longer reading the medical file but just kept looking at it just to avoid having to look at him. Landon just stood there for a moment unsure of what to say.Finally he walked to her desk and sat down across from her sliding the chair closer to the desk. ": Im sorry Belinda but its just kind of hard for me seeing, "..........Landon seemed unwilling or unable to say her name " that person is a lot harder then I expected."  
  
" You know Landon I thought I could handle it but I can't. Every time I see her I feel almost sad. Shes a contant reminder that Jamies not here, that shes no longer a part of my life I see her and I find myself thinking what would it be like if she was here now It reminds me that a part of my life is missing her friendship her guidance and most importantly her love."  
  
" Why Landon, Why Did you want her here? Even after you found out you still wanted her. Are you curious Landon, curious about her? Jamie was my best friend but she was your wife remember your wife Landon, supposedly the love of your life Well I got news for you Landon shes not Jamie, She may look like Jamie and may have the same hope and faith and spirit but she also has leukemia and shes dying maybe not today not even tommorow but she will die and I dont think you can handle it.  
  
When Belinda said those words He could feel his blood racing. He practically jumped out of his chair causing Belinda to look into his eyes. She could see the hurt in his eyes but also anger. " I don't need you to remind me that Jamie was my wife or to imply that I did not love her !  
  
Just then Eric walked. " Hey guys Whats going on you two ready to go? " Looking at Belinda he noticed she seemd agitated and that Landon seemed angry.  
  
" Whats going on? "  
  
" Why don't you ask Landon? " replied Belinda.Eric looked at Landon. " Nothing Man I gotta get out of here. " FIne Landon, thats just great, just leave, just go and leave runaway " said Belinda. Landon just turned and left without saying another word leaving just her and Eric. " Belinda would you mind telling me whats going on and would you please stop pretending to read the medical file and talk to me? " " We were just talking about Amy Johnson. "  
  
" It sounded more like argueing than talking. "  
  
" I think Landon is curious about Amy. "  
  
" And you aren't . I met her Belinda but she is really a nice person.Friendly,outgoing and a positive attitude plus shes very upbeat despite her condition. I think you would like her if you got to know her. Maybe you should talk to her she supposed to be here on friday."  
  
" The last thing I want to do is talk to her, to know her. I don't want to talk to her, to know her, I can't." if and when she dies it would..........would like her dying all over again. "  
  
" Well whatever you decide. One more thing you should really talk to Landon at least the sooner the better. Whatever you said to him it can't be that bad could it "  
  
Belinda thought to herself " Oh no it wasnt that bad I only just accused Landon of forgetting that Jamie was his wife and that supposedly she wasnt the love of his life Thats all. "  
  
" Im going home but think about what I said. and I see you tommorow."  
  
" Okay Eric take care. "  
  
After Eric left she got up and thought about what Eric had said and wondering what she could possibly say to Landon as she walked out of her office grabbing her purse and and went on home 


	11. Chapter Ten: Untitled

Chapter Ten : Untitled  
  
Landon finally arrived home. He pulled his car into the driveway of a modest two story home. He stepped out of his car and went to the front door of his house As he stepped in the front door it went into the living room, it was tastefully decorated.The only thing that seemed out of place was an old piano that had once belonged to Jamie. It was a gift from Reverend Sullivan many years ago and even though Landon had moved from place to place and had moved on to bigger and better things since money was no longer a problem he could not would not sell the old piano.  
  
Sitting atop the old piano was a picture of Jamie, Landon just stood there looking at the picture transfixed. He just stood there remembering....... remembering that after Jamie had died he always said hello to this picture and talk to her when he needed her, it had helped him through some pretty difficult times to know that she was always with him in spirit As time passed he eventually stopped talking to her, to her picture. He even stopped saying hello to her.But today, today was different." Hello Jamie my beautiful wife. Im sorry.......sorry for not talking to you for awhile. Actually I know its been longer then a while but.......but " Landon was unsure of what to say next " I miss you and I will always love you and I always will and a part of you will always be with me. Our love is like the wind I can't see it But I feel it.  
  
He walked from the living room to the stairs and went up to his bedroom where he changed from his suit and tie to a pair of jeans and a red polo shirt. Then he walked back downstairs to the living room sat down and turned on the tv. He flipped through a few channels then he turned off the tv and just sat there.  
  
As he sat there he thought about Jamie, he thought about Amy, but mostly thought about what Belinda had said. He still could not believe that she was capable of saying such things. He thought he knew her but now.....could he ever forgive her for saying such things.  
  
He really needed someone to talk to but who. Normally he would have talked to but Belinda but the situation was about her and Eric didnt seem to be the right person either. He thought about Reverend Sullivan or his dad but neither of them seem to be right either. The only other person he could think of was his mom as he reached for the phone.  
  
" Hello Mom its me Landon."  
  
. " Landon this is a suprise you normally call me well on wed, so why are you calling?"  
  
" Can't I just call my mom and say Hello.".  
  
" Whats wrong Landon?"  
  
" Nothings wrong."  
  
" Landon " she said in a voice she used when she knew he was lying she could always tell when he was hiding something.  
  
She could hear Landon taking a deep breathe on the other side of the phone as if preparing himself for what he was about to say.  
  
" Mom a we got a new patient in on monday. Her name is Amy johnson shes bright funny caring very pretty but she also leukemia  
  
Landon all your patients have leukemia so whats wrong Are you attracted to her ? you like her right?"  
  
no.........yes..............maybe.............I don't know  
  
"As long as your sure she said laughing."  
  
" mom its not funny Im confused. "  
  
"about what "  
  
" Theres something about her........something that thinks I might be attracted to her for the wrong reason. "  
  
"Are you afraid maybe because of the love you and jamie or maybe because she also has leukemia."  
  
" Theres more to it than that something that I have not mentioned yet."  
  
" What is it"  
  
"She looks exactly like Jamie"  
  
Landon didnt hear anything as if his mom was too stunned to speak finally he asked "Mom are you still there."  
  
" Sorry Landon I was just thinking I dont know what to say....Are you sure.? "  
  
" Im sure mom believe me Im sure and theres more."  
  
" What more could there be?"  
  
" Me and Belinda got into a fight  
  
"A fight " she said sounding alarmed.  
  
"Well not a fight more like an arguement. It was about Amy She reminded me that jamie was her best friend then accused me of being attracted to Amy. She then reminded me that Jamie was her best friend then she said remember Jamie she was your wife and supposedly the love of your life. I can't believe she said that that she would think I would ever forget Jamie."  
  
" Have you ever considerd the fact that Belinda might be jealous."  
  
"Belinda jealous Mom were best friends We've known each other for years.Maybe at one time, a long time ago she was jealous but now our friendship, our relationship is different."  
  
" Well maybe jealousy is the wrong word, maybe afraid would be a better word, but Landon did you ever stop to think she might have feelings for you beyond friendship."  
  
" Mom thats impossible."  
  
" Why is that impossible Landon?" Think about all the time you spend together Have you ever see her with someone, anyone has she ever dated anyone for any length of time in all the time you have known her.  
  
Well his Mom was right about but maybe because she had never found the right person he thought to himself  
  
All I want you to do Landon Is to think, think about what I said I cant tell you what to do or say but about what I said  
  
Okay Mom I will  
  
One more thing Landon when you see Belinda on sunday try to be Oh I dont know forgiving  
  
Whts make you think I will see Belinda on sunday.  
  
You two have been going to church together for the past....its been so many years I lost track And even if you two dont go together I know she will go and I know you will see her there so talk to her Landon talk to her please and forgive her otherwise you will end up regretting it for the rest of your life.  
  
I dont know if I can Mom  
  
If you don't Landon if you don't forgive her and she doesnt forgive you You two will lose your friendship and maybe a whole lot more.  
  
"What do you mean a whole lot more?"  
  
I mean your possible future together not just as friends but maybe something more which you two have been avoiding all these years  
  
I'll think about it Mom But I think your wrong about Belinda and me. Ill talk to you next week mom I love you.  
  
I love you too Landon bye  
  
As he hung up the phone he thought about what his Mom had said. She sure gave him a lot to think about before if and when he saw Belinda again.and if he even talked to her. 


	12. Chapter Eleven: True Feelings

Sorry if this chapter is kind of long. I just kept on writing and couldint stop I think this the longest one so far Chapter Eleven: True Feelings  
  
Belinda heard the soft music of her alarm radio playing as the soft music slowly drifted into her mind as she slowly woke up. Here it was sunday morning , she rolled over and looked at the time. She had not been sleeping very well the last three nights since her argument with Landon.She still had not decided whether or not to go to church. She had not talked to Landon since that friday. Normally Landon and Belinda always went to church together and he would always call the night before just to touch base and to confirm when and if he was to pick her up. They had been going to church together for fifteen years and this was the first time he did not call her, and she certainly wasn't going to call him She closed her eyes and took a deep breathe than slowly let it out. Relax she told herself relax ,snap out of it Belinda just get up out of bed get dressed and go. as she opened her eyes and climbed out of bed. An hour later she was in her car pulling up to her church. She showed up at the last possible moment just to avoid seeing Landon. Thinking to herself " If he doesn't want to see me or talk to me then maybe......... She didn't even finish the thought." This is so ridiculous if he did not talk to her today she would have to see him on monday no matter what so basically they both were just postponing the inevitable. As she parked her car and got out and walked toward the front of the church. In front was the Reverend greeting everyone as they walked in.  
  
Hello Belinda  
  
Hello Reverend  
  
I didn't think you were going to make it  
  
I had a medical emergency  
  
Nothing serious I hope ?  
  
No she's fine  
  
Thats good. I knew it had to be something important to keep you away. Landons already inside. I was suprised to see him without you, in all the years you have been coming here I think I have never seen you two apart. Even at other church functions I never saw just one of you.But go on in, Im sure Landon will be glad you made it and will be happy to see you.  
  
Reverend I think you should that Landon and I.................Belinda hesitated unsure of what to tell him  
  
What is it Belinda Is anything wrong ?  
  
" Oh its nothing." she said rather quickly " I'd better get inside Ill talk to later maybe after the service.".as she walked in.  
  
As she stepped inside she was wondering were she should sit. She decided to sit at the very back of the church. She flashed back to Landons and Jamie wedding and remembered that she also sat at the very back of the church because at the time she still felt uncomfortable around Jamie and she also felt like she didnt belong there.Finally the Reverend walked in and saw her sitting there by herself. She could see the suprise in his face that she was by herself as he walked by In fact she felt like eveyone in the whole church was looking at her and wondering why she wasn't sitting next to Landon. Some people in the church just loved to gossip and this will probaly get some peoples tounges wagging..  
  
After church Belinda just sat there watching eveybody leave. She noticed that Landon slipped out the other door as if to avoid seeing her. Someone must have told him I was here.When she was all alone she stood up and walked to the front of the church and sat in the second row and prayed though she wasnt exactly sure what she was praying for.  
  
Dear God, Its me, Belinda. I just wanted to say..............to say thank you, thank you for eveything. For all the blessings in my life. Someone once told me That talent was Gods gift to you and what you do with that talent is you gift back to God. That someone was Jamie Elizabeth Sullivan Carter and she was my best friend. We grew up together but we didnt become best friends till my senior year in high school then she....she died. Belinda closed her eyes as she said those last words.  
  
Suddenly she heard a voice out of nowhere "Belinda, are you okay?"  
  
She opened her eyes and saw the Reverend there standing next to her a concerned look on his face.  
  
Reverend I didn't hear you walk up  
  
Obviously not I didnt mean to startle you. I was just wondering if everything was allright.  
  
Belinda looked away closing her eyes not saying anything .  
  
Why dont you come to my office where we can talk privatley as he held out his hand she opened her eyes took his hand and stood and walked next to him toward his office.  
  
As they approached his office he opened the door for " thank you said Belinda  
  
Would you like to sit on a chair or maybe the couch maybe  
  
The couch is fine  
  
So have a seat  
  
So how are things going.?  
  
Fine  
  
Just fine  
  
Yes just fine  
  
So hows Landon doing.?  
  
Fine  
  
Just fine  
  
Yes just fine hes doing great just lovely  
  
He detected a bit of anger in her voice when he asked about Landon.  
  
So whats wrong.?  
  
Nothings wrong  
  
Are you sure nothings wrong because I noticed you and Landon seem to be avoiding each other. And when I asked you how Landon was doing you seemed kind of angry  
  
Im not angry.  
  
Well how about upset, upset that Landon did or say something.  
  
Has Landon ever mentioned Jamie Sullivan to you.?  
  
He has talked to me about her a couple of times.  
  
Only a couple of times  
  
Well actually more than a couple of a times.  
  
What did he say about her.?  
  
I really can't say its something between just Landon and me but I know enough but if this about her the only thing I can say is that you two need to move on. Landons needs to move on if he ever hopes to have a relationship with you beyond friendship and you need to let go of your friendship with Jamie so you dont feel guilty about taking her place in Landons life.  
  
As he said those words she had a look of shock and suprise on her face " Thats...............thats.............not...... it " she said stammering " thats..... not whats wrong "  
  
Are you sure its not that because your voice doesnt sound very convincing. Are you trying to coinvice me or maybe yourself.? But I have to ask you this question. Are you in love with Landon Carter.?  
  
As soon as he asked the question she stood up and walked to the window looking outside. " It sure is a beautiful day isnt it."  
  
Quit trying to change the subject Belinda. Are you in love with Landon.?  
  
She didn't say anything. What could she say. Yes, no, maybe. None of them seemed to be the right answer. Finally she just said " I don't know."  
  
But you must feel something for him. Think why are you reacting this way, to him, to Amy Johnson.  
  
He told you about her, When, how.?  
  
Landon actually stopped by to see me Saturday night.  
  
So you know everything.?  
  
Yes. Belinda think about all the time you spend together. How do you feel when he looks at you.?  
  
She thought back to thursday when she was reading to the children and she realized he was watching her. How she felt almost embarassed, almost blushing. All she could say was " Im just glad to have him as a friend, to be there when I need him.  
  
Well maybe you just need to have a serious talk with him. I know he's still here because he had a meeting. with other church members so if you leave now you just might be able to catch him if you leave now.  
  
She turned quickly and went to the door. " Thanks for talking to me Ill talk to you later sorry I have to go.  
  
I know Belinda Good Luck.  
  
As she stepped out of the office she was practically running. She knew where the meeting was being held but as she got there the room was empty except for one person. " Excuse me but have you seen Doctor Carter:"?  
  
You just missed him he left a few minutes ago but if you hurry you might catch him he went straight down the halll door to the left.  
  
Thanks  
  
She ran down the hall and through the door to the parking lot she spotted him just opening his car door Landon she called out as she was running out to him Landon wait When he saw her he hesitated about whether he should just get into her car and go without talking to her.  
  
Im glad I caught up to you I really need to talk to you.Landon just stood there not saying a word.  
  
" Okay " said Belinda What I wanted to say was that Im sorry, sorry for everything I said. He just stood there not moving not talking. He was starting to make Belinda feel uncomfortable. " Landon don't be this way."  
  
What way is that  
  
I said Im sorry what more do you want She began to feel the anger boiling up within her.  
  
Maybe to be left alone,to not talk to might be nice at least for now as he pened his car and sat inside cloasing the door behind as he then opened his window looking at her.  
  
Please wait dont go please. I have to tell you something something I should of told you a long time ago.  
  
What is it.  
  
Landon I......... Saying it was a lot harder the she thought considering she still wasnt sure what she should say to him  
  
"Thats what I thought" said Landon as he started his car and pulled away leaving Belinda standing there  
  
After Landon left she just stood there for the longest time thinking, thinking about everything that happened , not just the last week but everything that has happened since that senior year in high school. Im not going to cry she said, I am not going to cry but she failed as she felt the tears start rolling down her face as she turned around and started toward her car. 


	13. Chapter Twelve: Amy finds out

Chapter Twelve: Amy finds out  
  
Belinda had not seen or talked to Landon since that sunday. Belinda had that monday off and Landon had tuesday off and here it was wed and Landon had called out saying he was not feeling well She knew Landon was avoiding seeing her and to tell you the truth she had know idea what to say to him if she even did see him and to top it off Amy was scheduled to come in today so see Eric and Belinda had asked Eric if she could talk to Amy after her appointment though she wasn't sure what he would ask or talk to her about.  
  
So now she just sat in her office waiting. She had finished with seeing her morning patients and she was waiting for Eric to finish with Amy so Belinda could see her. Eric wasn't sure about letting her see Amy alone. He knew eveything that was going on and wasn't comfortable about leaving her alone. She kidded him about it saying it was your idea that I should talk to Amy.  
  
Suddenly she heard a soft knocking at the door. Belinda its me Eric is it okay to come in  
  
Sure come on in.  
  
Hi Belinda  
  
Hello Eric  
  
So how is it going? I finished with Amy I already mentioned it to her that you wanted to talk to her Can I ask you something ?  
  
Sure what is it ?  
  
What do you want to talk to Amy about ?  
  
To be honest I dont know.  
  
Your not going to say or do anything stupid are you ?  
  
I dont know what you mean.  
  
Okay Belinda Ill play it your way for now but think before you say anything.  
  
Hello Ms Johnson Im Doctor Reynolds. Please call me Amy. Fine you can still call me Doctor Reynolds. Amy was kind of taken aback by her reaction. Why was she reacting so hostile. but Amy had finally decided she had enough of this.  
  
She stood up from the exam table and stood directly in front of Belinda her arms folded in front of her staring straight into her eyes " What is with you anyway. Since the first day I started coming here youve been nothing but hostile towards me.. Ive seen the way you look at me Always staring then looking away and that day when I was in the garden talking to Landon I saw you Doctor Reynolds you looking upset that I was actually talking to him giving me dirty looks Ive tried to be nice to you even cheerful but all that seems to do is increase your anger your hostility towards me. So im just going to come out and say it Why are you treating me this way whatever did I do to you.. Amy watched Belinda waiting for some kind of reaction. Amy for the first time realized that Belinda looked tired, like she was getting very little sleep. She could see her lips quivering then her entire body begin to tremble Finally she just blurted out Im sorry so sorry for everything and she turned quickly to leave. No wait please dont go just talk to me please, I really need to know whats going on With her back towards her she said Ill send a nurse back in to bring you to my office I need to do a few things before I see you 5 minutes then we can talk privately.  
  
As Belinda went straight to her office and went quickly to the wall taking the picture of her and Jamie off the wall and sitting it face down on her desk. She doudted that Amy would notice the picture but didnt want her too see it in case she changed her mind about telling her. Belinda heard a soft knocking at her door Dr Reynolds its me Sarah I have Amy Johnson with me  
  
As Amy looked around her office she was drawn to the picture of the children on Belindas wall looking up at the words Jamies Legacy above the pictures. Seeing Jamies name on the wall brought up a lot of questions but instead of asking them she just said. " It must be nice to have helped so many children so many families. Sometimes when I look at my life I wish I had helped people more made a difference in peoples lives as you obviously have done When I found out I had leukemia I tried to change to help but it was to late for me i didnt have the strenght or the willpower and pretty soon my money was all being used for treatements."  
  
I suppose you wondering why I wanted too see you.  
  
You see you kind of remind me of her.  
  
Her you mean jamie sullivan  
  
Yes  
  
In which way ?  
  
Belinda looked at her unsure of what to say whether she should go through with this.  
  
Maybe I shouldint be telling you this  
  
No don't stop I want to know. I feel....... I feel like I'm doing something wrong something terribly wrong just by being here.  
  
I have something to show you.  
  
What is it ?  
  
A picture  
  
I don't understand what does that have to do with the way the way you have been treating me and with whats going on.  
  
I really shouldin't telling this but once I show you the picture I think you will understand.  
  
Belinda stood up from the couch and walked to her desk picking up the picture from her desk then sat back down in front of Amy looking into her eyes. " This picture was taken about fifteen years ago, its of me and Jamie.  
  
Okay said Amy  
  
Belinda help the picture close to her as if unwilling to let go then held it at arms lenght looking at it then looking at Amy into her eyes then looking at the picture again.  
  
Amy looked at her questioningly,kind of perplexed " Dr Reynolds "  
  
Belinda looked up from the picture then handed it to Amy.  
  
Amy took the picture in her hands then looked down at the picture.  
  
She saw Belinda smiling at the camera hugging a person next to her.Then she looked at the face of the person next to Belinda , Jamies face. her face She blinked twice then closed her eyes then opened them again trying to be sure what she saw. It couldin't be it can't be but it was. the face the eyes the mouth even her smile and the color of her hair.and finally she understood everything.  
  
Why Belinda was acting so strange the first day.Why she was always staring at her. Why Landon appeared so shocked when he first met her and why Eric at first couldin' look at her and was so nervous when he examined her the first time." I have a lot of questions " was all Amy could say " I know you do but why don't we exchange phone numbers " as she handed her a card " I will call you later and we can met at my house later to talk if thats okay with you."  
  
That would be fine and thanks for showing me. I now realize how hard it must be for you for all of you to see me, as they both stood up as Belinda showed her the door as Amy handed her a card also " here is my phone number also so we can make plans to talk. Thanks for telling me " Amy said as she left 


	14. Chapter Thirteen:Untitled

Chapter Thirteen : Untitled  
  
After Amy had left Belinda had continued seeing her patients till it was about 5:00 pm. By 5:30 everyone had left except for her and Sarah.who was sitting at the front desk finishing her paperwork and Belinda was in her office going through some medical records but mostly she was thinking. Belinda could still not believe she had told Amy about Jamie but whats done was done she thought and it was too late now and whatever happened happened, she would just have to have faith that it would all turn out okay in the end.  
  
As she sat there her phone rang interrupting her thoughts. She quickly picked it up and said hello." Hello Belinda I have a call from Amy Johnson. She said its important and needs to talk to you." Amy Johnson said Belinda. Yes she said she really needs to talk to you. Sarah could hear the apprehension, the tentiveness in her voice. She knew something was wrong , that something was bothering her the last few weeks.but she couldin't figure out what was wrong. The only thing that seemed out of place was that Landon had not been around or that Belinda had not called him.and Belinda had not said anything about it . In fact Belinda had not said anything for five minutes , so Sarah just said If you rather not talk to her I could tell her your unavailabe or that you already left.  
  
No its okay I just need a few minutes to finish what Im doing so after I hang up transfer her call to me in five minutes then she thought only five minutes I dont think five hours would be enough time as she hung up her phone trying to compose her thoughts , her feelings. When her phone finally rang she let it ring once twice then three times before she finally picked it up. Hello was all she could say even though she knew who it was.  
  
Hello this Doctor Reynolds speaking."How may I help you" ? was all she could say" then she realized how stupid she most sound considering she that it was Amy and know doudt Sarah probaly told her that she was expecting her call.  
  
Hello Doctor Reynolds its me Amy. Im just calling to see when it would be a good time to get together and talk and I was thinking about tonight around seven. I mean I know its short notice and all but I'm really kind of anxious to get together and talk and I really can't wait any longer please.  
  
Belindas first reaction was to say no that it was too soon she was really not ready for this but Amys voice sounded so sincere so honest kind and gentle she could not help but think of Jamie and what she would have done.and she found herself saying yes reluctantly.  
  
You dont know how relieved I am to hear you say that.  
  
She decided that it would be best if they met at her house so she gave Amy her home phone and address and directions to her house.  
  
After Belinda hung up the phone she glanced at her watch . It was now 5:45 and she told Amy to come over at 6:30 if she was going to make it she would have to leave now. She stood up and put on her coat and picked uo her purse as she left her office straight to the front office were Sarah was working . Sarah she said as she looked up she was kind of suprised to see Belinda standing there with her coat on and purse in hand.  
  
So your leaving ?  
  
Yes I really need to leave now.  
  
Sarah was full of questions but she just said " Well take care And I will see you monday then.  
  
Okay said Belinda Take care of yoir self she said as she left quickly.  
  
Belinda pulled into her driveway at asbout 6:00 She opened her garage and quickly went inside her house was modest decorated her house was well organiozed but it was mostly that way Belinda spent very little time at home she was either at the center seeing patients or at the hospitol or doing research into causes and cures for chilhood leukemia which left her with very little free time time that she spent mostly with landon and sometimes Eric. Not much food in refrigerator either.  
  
Belinda paced nervousley in her livung room waiting for Amy to show up . At 6:45 Amy still had not shown up and by this time she stopped pacing and sat down wondering why she was late she had her phone home number so if she was late she would have probaly called unless she changed her mind about seeing her and woulod probaly call later . Suddenly she hear a soft cautious knocking at her front door In fact it was so soft at first she wondered if she even heard it  
  
She opened it and saw Amy standing there, she flashed back to when Jamie came to her house for dinnder the one and only time when she could still get around it was the last time that it was to of them had tallked just by themselves the two of them alone and though she did see Jamie after that dinner they were never alone together there was always some body around visiting her before she died when she thought back to that day she felt a sadness overcome her.As she stood there she realized that she had said anything to Amy that the both of them were just standing there Finally Amy just said Hi Im sorry Im late but I got kinda lost. Thats okay I guess all that matters is that your finally here but you could have called . No I just took the wrong street is all but by the time i figured it but it took a lot longer thenm i figured to bet back then I thought I said it was okay.  
  
No hostilty there Amy thought to herself sarcastically but still Belinda just stood there in the doorway not saying anything not inviting her in. Maynbe this was a big mistake Maybe she should just leave . Instead she just said So can I come in or you just going to make me wait . She meant to say it as a joke but it came out differently her tone the way she said it it sounded sarcastic almost mean plus she realized she wasnt smiling and said it to serious not in a playful way.  
  
Well since your here I guess I dont have a choice in the matter . This is not going well maybe i shouldint have been doing this maybe i should have given her more time  
  
Whats the matter afraid to come in.  
  
Im not afraid at all least of all you.she said as she practilly pushed Belinda aside as she went inside. Im not afraid I was just thinking you might need more time before we talked Did you ever think that you might be the one whos afraid.  
  
What do I have to be afraid of ?  
  
Isnt it obvious. I look exactly like Jamie Sullivasn and while I don't know all the facts I have this feeling that Jamie and Landon where close, that they meant a lot to each other but shes gone now and why and not sure of all the details of your relationship with Landon but Ive seen the way you look at him I know you feel something for him and I get this feeling he feels something for you but something is stopping you .  
  
Please stop Belinda just blurted out all of the sudden were ...were just friends nothing more and yes Jamie meant a lot to Landon and to me also as Belinda just as suddenly stopped talking and sat down on the sofa. You seem awfullly sure about what you just said almost too sure almost like you reversed it thousands of times in your head in your thoughts as she sat down next to her wondering what she say next maybe a change of the subject matter would be better so she asked. So tell me about Jamie Sullivan?  
  
It was so long ago, me , Landon, Jamie , Eric.We all grew up together in the same town Beufort North Carolina We all went to the same schools attended the same classes . Even when we were just kids we were friends but thing happens when you get older become teenagers suddenly things become more important and the things that didnt matter as kids suddenly matter when you get older. but Jamie, Jamie stayed the same and we just started treating her differently not all at once just but little by little . We changed we started seeing less and less of her. We started treating her like an outcast at least in our group we became the popular bunch while Jamie didnt believe in those things which we represented. Anyaways pretty soon we were not talking to her then we started making fun of her because of the way she dresses the way she acted what she believed in. Looking back now I never realized how she most of felt suddenly being abandoned by people who thought you were her friends and not having a mom to grow up with must have been rough but Jamie had a faith a strength and she didnt care what people thought of her.  
  
Anyways things pretty much stayed the same all the way through high school till the senior year. We all went one way and Jamie went her way. She started singing in church, volunteered for the red cross, joined the star and planets and was in the drama club. She was really smart,talented and probaly would have suceeded at anything she tried it wasnt till years later that she wanted to become a doctor but then then she got...... . " She found out she had leukemia" said Amy  
  
Yes  
  
So what changed your mind about her, I mean was it the fact that she was sick. No it wasnt that you see.It was more than that Jamie was just Jamie. I changed mind about her long before I knew she had leukemia, that that she was dying .  
  
You see Landon at one time a long time ago he was my boyfriend in high school most popular guy most popular kind of thing. Then one day he broke up with me but I was still in love with him and I always thought I would get him back but then Jamie came along. I tried my best to stop him, to stop them but whatever I did seemed to make them stronger. I admit I was jealous so I did a prank on her.  
  
What was it.  
  
Id rather not say. Lets just say it was something on Jamie and when Landon found out he.....he defended her , protected her even hit one of his best friends and then he walked out taking Jamie with him his arm around her protectivly.comforting her and when I saw that I realized he was in love with her and that I had lost him. I just stood there staring in disbelief almost crying.  
  
I would say that the day we started becoming friends was the day I visited Jamie in the hospitol And kind of just talked to her about things And even after all the things I did to her and said about her she treated me like a friend and never did bring up our past history never asked anything from me not even an apology she waited till I was ready to give which didnt happen till months later at the picnic where that picture was taken.Amy wasnt sure what to say next glancing at clock on the wall Its really getting late And Im sure you have a lot to do tommorow and Belinda replied " and you should be getting a lot more rest because of the seriousness of your condition " as they both stood up heading toward the door.  
  
Well it been nice hasn't it said Amy.  
  
" Yes it has " said Belinda , Maybe we could get togther sometime maybe for lunch.  
  
Id like that I like it very much Amy replied as she walked out of the door so I guess I will see you later so take care of yourself you too and drive safely as she watched Amy leave.  
  
Belinda could not but help but think of Jamie and wondering if it was a mistake to have asked Amy to lunch because in the back of Belindas mind was an uneasy thought that maybe she had asked her because of Jamie and her resemblance to her. 


	15. Chapter Fourteen: Amys Chances

Chapter Fourteen: Amys Chances  
  
When Amy returned home that wed night after seeing Belinda she noticed that she had a message on her answering machine. When she went to play the message she heard Erics familiar voice.  
  
Hello Amy, " Its me Eric. I need you to give me a call as soon as you get in. Its important that you call me at home you have my number so call me as soon as you get in even if its late. So call me. "  
  
As soon as she heard the message Amy began to feel anxious. Eric probaly had her test results. She now wondered if it would do any good to keep on going. It was probaly her last chance, whether she would live or die.  
  
She picked up her cordless phone and walked over to the couch sitting down just staring at the phone in her hand almost afraid to call and whether it was good news or bad news.Finally she dialed Erics phone number and waited for Eric to answer.  
  
Hello  
  
Hello Eric, It's me Amy , Im just returning your call.  
  
Hello Amy, So how are you doing ?  
  
Fine, How are you ?  
  
Im Feeling okay, Are you having any problems ?  
  
No, Why do you ask ?  
  
Because........... no reason in particular. Well the reason I wanted you to call me is that I have your test results in.  
  
"Oh" was all she could say.  
  
Yes so I really need to talk to you. How about tommorow maybe thu afternoon around 1:00  
  
Amy finally just asked, "Couldin't you just tell me over the phone."  
  
Id rather not, I think it would be best if I talked to you in person.  
  
Amy thought about asking him why but deep down she knew the reason why and for the first time since she had gotten sick she was actually scared, for if it was good news Eric would have told her over the phone and his last comment really frightened her.  
  
Amy was afraid, afraid of knowing her chances of living or dying. Thank you Eric Ill see you tommorow at 1:00.  
  
Okay said Eric Ill see you then.  
  
She turned off the phone stood up and returned the phone to its base then returned to the front of the couch just standing there unsure of what she should do next.Finally she sat down her hands trembling, kind of hugging herself, her eyes closed. For the first since she found she was sick she was actually terrified, terrified of dying. She actually found herself losing hope, her faith, her strenght to go on. She slowly slid off the couch till she was sitting on the carpet her hands clasped togther as she felt tears streaming down her face as she said aloud  
  
Dear God , Its me Amy. Please help, I........I don't what to do. Im so afraid.............so alone. My parents are both gone and Im an only child. Why me , why know. I really need your help now. They say you answer all prayers and that sometimes the answer is no. That there is a higher purpose a reason for everything. I would like to believe that. That maybe bad things happen to inspire us, inspire others the way Jamies passing inspired Landon, Belinda and Eric to become doctors, to help so many others. I would hope my passing and my time on earth served a purpose. Amen  
  
The next day Amy woke and just stayed at home. As it got closer to 1:00 she took a shower and got dressed but was really to nervous to eat anything. As she got into her car and as she started driving to the center she was thinking about her mom, her dad, her relationship with them. The last time she talked with them before they went. She also thought the people she knew, her past relationships wondering why she never married and never had children of her own. Looking back she regreted that fact, never making her parents grandparents but they never said anything about it never pressured her. They just wanted her to be happy and now she would never have the chance she thought as she pulled into the centers parking lot found a space and got out of her car walking toward the entrance.  
  
When she walked in she spotted Belinda behind the front desk. When she saw her Belinda walked up to her through the waiting room door.  
  
I didn't know you were coming in today.  
  
Eric called me last night and needed to see me.  
  
Belinda noticed that Amy looked kind of tired almost like she had also been maybe crying all night. " Are you okay ?  
  
Im fine really. Why do you ask ?  
  
Just that you look tired.  
  
Im fine really , really I am don't worry as she turned quickly away from her looking for a place to sit down.  
  
Belinda looked at her worried , not just as a patient but after last night she felt different about her. In which way she didn't exactly know but she was concerned.So she just called out "Amy." and as soon as she said it she stopped.  
  
" Oh God " she thought for when Belinda asked how she was doing she felt herself tearing up.and had to turn quickly to hide her face so she stood there unwilling to face her So she just said " Yes "  
  
Dont forget about us having lunch together. In fact since your here after your finished with Eric maybe we could get together then.  
  
Amy finally turned around looking straight at Belinda. As soon as Belinda saw Amys face she knew something was wrong. She walked up to her and said " Why don't you come with me to my office where we can talk."  
  
Okay  
  
As soon as they got into her office they both sat down on the sofa. Amy had composed herself a little. She had stopped crying but she was still overwrought and her hands were still trembling.  
  
It will be okay, just close your eyes. Take a slow deep breathe, then let it out slowly as Belinda took Amys hands into hers holding them.  
  
Im sorry, I know you have more important things you should be doing.  
  
You have nothing to be sorry for. Thats what Im here for.  
  
Finally she just blurted out " Im dying." Amys hands started to shake again. Belinda held her hands more tightly.  
  
Why would you say such a thing. Did Eric say anything to you ?  
  
No but he said he wanted to see me, that he had my test results but he wouldin't tell me over the phone. Ill understand if you dont want to have lunch with me.  
  
Why would I do such a thing.  
  
Maybe because..........because you might get to know me better and because of Jamie and the fact that Im not well and I see a certain sadness in your eyes every time you look at me.  
  
Im sorry I didn't realize it showed But Amy I see some older patients all the time and most of them I get to know real well and some make and some don't and some I would consider friends.  
  
But Im different because of her.  
  
But your not her. Your two different people.  
  
Do you know that , in your heart do you now that? I just don't want you to go through all that again, any of you. I just dont want to regret us being closer to us being friends.  
  
I think its already to late to worry about that now.  
  
I don't understand what you mean by that.  
  
I mean after last night I would consider you a friend, maybe even a close friend.  
  
Amy was suprised to hear what Belinda had just said. She could not think of anything to say except " Thank you "  
  
No problem  
  
You can do something for me though.  
  
Sure what is it  
  
I really need you to talk to Landon. Not just see him bu talk to him. I kind of feel thats whats going on is my fault.  
  
I really can't think of anything I would want to talk to Landon about.  
  
You know what about  
  
I don't know what you mean.  
  
Just look inside your heart. You know what to do but whatever you do or don't do I at least need you two to become friends again okay.  
  
Okay I promise Now lets go see Eric Im sure he waiting for you.  
  
She could see the hesitation in her eyes. " It will be okay Ill go with you if you like.  
  
Thanks  
  
Come on lets go then as they both stood and headed for the door and to Erics office.  
  
Eric was sitting in his office waiting when he heard a knock at his door.  
  
Yes  
  
Doctor Hunter, I have Amy Johnson with me.  
  
Eric stood up from his desk and walked toward the door and opened it." Hello Amy nice to see you againcome on in and have a seat."  
  
" Thanks Eric " she said as she walked in Eric was suprised to see Belinda coming in behind her.  
  
Hello Eric  
  
Hello Belinda, What are you doing here ?  
  
Im just here to offer moral support.  
  
" Okay then why don't you both have a seat at the desk" as Eric walked with them as he took his seat behind the desk.  
  
Eric sat behind his desk checking his notes and her records for a few minutes. Finally he put his notes down as he looked directly at Amy. Amy your condition has stabilized. You haven't gotten any worse but your also not getting any better. Your doing okay the medications you are taking are still effective however there effectiveness has gone down the last two months but your doing okay for now.  
  
" For now " said Amy as she took Belinda hand holding it.  
  
Yes but your condition will continue to slowly worsen over time. There are different drugs we can use to increase your strenght, more energy to try to give you a normal life for as long as possible.  
  
Amy closed her eyes took a deep breathe and asked " How long ? "  
  
Hard to say maybe six months to a year.  
  
Can anything else be done ?  
  
Your parents are both deceased and you have no siblings so a bone marrow transplant is out if the question and no donor has been found through the registry at least not yet. However their are a number of universitys doing experimental programs involving treatment of leukemia and I am in contact with them And I will let you know. So if you have any questions.  
  
No.........no questions  
  
One more thing I want to know if your okay And To say how sorry I am and call me anytime if you have any questions or problems or any unusual symptoms even if its nothing;  
  
Okay Eric. I just want to thank you for everything you have done for me so far.  
  
No problem he said as he stood up from behind his desk giving Amy a hug as she and Belinda stood up as they all walked toward his door. " Take care of yourself Amy And I will see you later Belinda.  
  
Bye Eric and thank you said Belinda As Eric closed the door behind them. 


	16. Chapter Fifteen: Untitled

Chapter Fifteen : Untitled  
  
It had been two weeks since since Eric had told Amy the news.Her condition was stable for now. She wasn't getting any worse but she wasn't exactly gettting any better either. How ever she had felt herself getting weaker. Some days she had lots of energy but on other days she just couldin't seem to get out of bed much less out of the house to do anything.  
  
However when she awoke this thurs morning she really felt well rested , better then she had in days. In fact she felt like she had a lot of energy so she decided to drive to a local park maybe take a little walk their although she probaly could have walked their also because it was really not that far but with her conditon she thought it better to save her strength.  
  
As she pulled up to the park she thought it looked kind of familiar to her though she never had really been her before. as she stepped out of the car. And started to walk along a pathway. She saw a number of people jogging by her. It was a really beautiful day and she was really happy just to be out then a dark thought crossed her mind as she wondered how many days she would have like this how many did she have left..She was now walking on a trail next to a small lake with a bench near the shore and as she saw the bench she had a strange sense of deja vu as if she had been here before which was impossible.  
  
As she was walking along the path she saw a number of people jogging by her. It was a really beautiful day. She was really happy just to be outside. As she was walking she saw a man from a distance jogging towards her from a distance something about him caught her eye. As he got closer she could finally see who it was. It was him, it was Landon of all people. She could tell he had not seen her yet and for some reason she felt an urge to hide from him to turn around so he would not see her and just let him go by her but why was she feeling this way why did she want to avoid seeing him and yet also wanted to see him.Was it because of of what Belinda had told her about her and Landons friendship or was it because of Jamie. Finally she just decided to just keep on walking .  
  
As he jogged on by she could tell by the look on his face that he recognized her but he just kept on going Well that went well she thought to herself as she kept on walking, looking straight ahead not even glancing behind her.  
  
Suddenly from behind her she could hear him stop jogging then turning around and walking up to her slowly as he called out to her.  
  
Amy is that you I did not recognize you you look different. She couldin't think of anything to say except  
  
I just haven't been feeling well the last few days this is actually the fiist day I felt well enought to go out. As she talked she could see a look of concern on his face  
  
Eric didn't mention it to me that you were not feeling well.  
  
It's because I didn't call him.  
  
Landon sat Amy down on a bench as he took her pulse.  
  
Landon Im fine, really I am.  
  
When Amy said those words Landon flinched As he remembered that Jamie had said those exact same words to him.  
  
Your Pulse is a little fast and you seem kind of pale and you do seem to have a slight fever but I wont know for sure till I get you back to the clinic.  
  
Landon I really don't want to go. It's so beautiful out here, I just want to enjoy this day because because I really don't know how many I will have ...........Amy stopped short of what she was about to say saying instead " How many more nice days we will have like this."  
  
I still think its important that I check you out to make sure your doing okay.  
  
Okay Ill go but on only one condition.  
  
Whats that.  
  
That you go out with me Tonight.  
  
Out you mean like a date. When Landon said the word date Suddenly Amy found herself getting flustered with embarrasment.  
  
"No not a date " she said laughing " kind of like just as friends And I though it might be nice to get out a little " but in the back of her mind she felt a kind of anticipation, of seeing what the night might bring , of possibilities.  
  
Okay then Ill pick you up then. How about if I meet you somewhere say here for intance around 6:00 okay . Okay then 6:00 tonight but you promised mr I would get to check you out first.  
  
They both drove to the center in seperate cars and they both walked in together as soon as they walked in Eric spotted them right away He would not have been suprised too see Landon here on his day off because of some emergency with some patient and he was not suprised to see him in regular clothes but he was suprised to see him with Amy which kind of made him glad that at least Belinda was not here to see this. Eric knew that Belinda felt something for Landon but she decided long ago that their friendship was more important However since Amy came into the picture he knew she had been having second thoughts about her descision.  
  
Hello Landon, Hello Amy What are you two doing here ? I ran into Amy at the park and she said she wasn't feeling well so I brought her back here just to do a check up on her.  
  
So Amy your not feeling well Well I have few moments to spare Ill be happy to check you out. Thanks for bringing her in Landon I've got it from here why don't you enjoy the rest of your day off.  
  
Thats okay buddy Ill handle this one. Im sure you have plenty to do  
  
Eric , Landon Im fine really its just that Landon insisted. But I promised him I would go if he promised me to go out with......Amy suddenly stopped short realizing what she was about to say stammering....if he went out.......out.  
  
Landon quickly said if only I went out and saw this movie she really liked and suggested I go see it.  
  
Yes thats it said Amy  
  
Really said Eric not believing a word either of them said. He knew instictively what Amy was about to say before she hesitated And Landon saying a movie sounded like a lame excuse.  
  
So Eric do you have an exam room I can use.  
  
Exam # 2 is available  
  
Okay said LAndon and as Sarah walked by he called out Sarah would you mind taking Amy to exam # 2 I have to talk to Eric about something Ill be in shortly.  
  
As Amy left with Sarah Eric turned toward Landon and said " I hope you know what your doing Landon."  
  
I have examined plenty of patients I know what Im doing he said jokingly.  
  
Thats not what Im talking about  
  
What are you talking about  
  
I think you know what about and I just want to think about what you are about to do tonight.  
  
Im really not planning anything tonight.  
  
What ever you say Landon but whatever you decide to do I really think you need to think about it before you get more involved.  
  
Okay Eric whatever you say.  
  
One more thing  
  
What  
  
Whatever you do you need to tell Belinda something anything.  
  
Okay I wll but I really need to see Amy shes waitung for me as he turned and left to see her.  
  
Sorry it took so long to get up the next chapter but I but I work two jobs during the summer So I havent been able to spend much time writing but now thats summer is over hopefully I will actually be able to finish this story and get on to my next story idea. I kind of rushed this chapter because I didnt want you to forget this story so I might make some changes to it and some corrections to it especially the ending. As always please read and review. Thanks again 


	17. Chapter Sixteen: Untitled

Chapter Sixteen : Untitled

As she walked up to the park she saw Landon standing by his car waiting for her. She was kind of nervous , excited ,about seeing him so she decided to walk to the park to calm the butterflys flying in her stomach.

When Landon saw Amy the sun was setting off to the side of her. Landon thought she looked great with the sun setting off to the side of her. She was dressed very formal and elegant in a black form fitting dress Landon couldin't help but stare at her. In the soft glow of the setting sun she looked incredibly beautiful. Landon had to remind himself of who she was. As she walked up to him she couldin't help but smile at him.

" Hello Landon"

" Hello Amy"

Both of them stood there neither one of them sure of what to say next.

Finally Landon spoke, "So how are you feeling" ?

"Im okay No problems no problems at all. So where are we going."?

" I'd thought we would go to an out door concert."

" An outdoor concert" ?

"Yes I hope you like classical music"?

" I actually have never been to a concert but it sounds wonderful."

As Landon walked her to his car and opened the car door for her,

As they got to the concert Landon escorted her to the front row of the concert hall.

"Im impressed But how did you get front row seats and on such short notice."

" I have a few connections" he laughed not telling Amy that he had paid for the seats for the entire year and that he and Belinda regularly went to the concert once a month but since ther arguement they have not been going together.

As thr outdoor light began to dim the music started. Finally the llight went out completely replaced by the light of the moon and the stars.

Amy thought the music was beautiful. She just sat there listening to the music with Landon beside her. She couldint help but feel a little sad. She closed her eyes and let the music flow through her, It really is beautiful she thought as she felt the tears coming down her face.

As Landon sta listening to the music he glanced at Amy and noticed the tears on her face.Landon took Amy hand in his it was soft and warm to the touch. as he asked Amy "Are you okay."

" Im fine Landon really I am , its just that I never felt and heard anything so lovely I feel so alive because of the music and just because of life itself and ".............Amy looked down unable to express her feelings at this moment.

"Its okay Amy I know exactly how you feel."

" Im sorry"

" As I said its okay but if you want to leave."

"No I would not dream of it" as she held Landons hand more tightly "I want to stay."

"Okay" said Landon.

They didn't talk very much after that during the rest of the concert. Amy was entranced by the rest of the evening the music, the stars, just by everything.

Landon could not but help but stare at her face the rest of the evening. in the soft glow of the moonlight she really looked incredible and for a moment he thought of something something he had not of thought of in a long time. but with Amy next to him his hand in hers he wondered what his life would have been like if Jamie had lived.

After the concert Landon drove Amy home. They didn't really talk very much on the way home.

Both were kind of lost in ther own thoughts. Landon was thinking about a lot of things these last few weeks. He was thinking about Jamie, About his friendship with Belinda and her feeling toward him alll these years and also about Amy and the seriousness of her medical condition. Could he go through all of it over again as he had with Jamie.Nothing had happened yet between them as he would have considered it a beginning friendship.

Amy was also thinking about a lot of things. She was thinking about Landon and what a nice guy he was and why did she have to meet him now. Also did she have a right to start something which might never get a chance to finish. She thought about Belinda knowing she cared for Landon. Maybe it would be best if they were just friends.

When they pulled up in front of Amys apartment building Landon got out first then opened Amy car door for her. " Thank you Lndon " She said as she got out. As landon walked Amy to the front of the building he was strangely quiet. " Thank you again Landon I had a wonderful evening." She really had a wonderful evening she wasnt just saying it she really meant it. She could see why Belinda felt that way about him. As they both stood ther she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. As she pulled back from him she looked into his eyes and regretted what she just did.She saw a sadness in his eyes,his face.

" Im so sorry I..........I should not have done that, I just wanted to show my appreciation." " You have nothing to be sorry for." replied Landon as he took Amys hand in his holding it. She looked away unsure of what to do or say.

Finally he spoke. " Listen Amy I have a lot of things on my mind,to work out. I really don't know what else to say." Amy looked up unsure of what to say. Should she tell hin that she knew about Jaime, about everything. She just said " I understand." as she gave Landon a quick hug then turned and quickly left to enter her building. " Amy wait " Landon called out but she didn't look back leaving Landon just standing there.


End file.
